Tomorrow kicks off the next chapter in my life.
Tuesday morning I unofficially start college, spending time with other students. Students like myself whose parents did not attend college, are financially in need, and in my case, in need of a support system to get through school. Most likely students who are much younger than myself.
On the agenda for Tuesday? A ropes course. I wasn’t real sure what that had to do with going to college so I checked it out. It’s more about building trust, learning problem solving strategies, and teamwork then cracking the books. For me it’s the next step in the journey that has taken 53 years to begin. It’s about over coming fear and breaking free from the mold I find myself having been stuffed into. It’s about letting the inner me emerge from the cocoon.
I am doing my best to push negativity and doubt from my mind and my surroundings. Going back to school is a very big step for me. It is something I have thought of doing for many years, but never had the guts to try. Mostly due to that voice inside my head telling me I couldn’t do it. I didn’t have time, I certainly didn’t have the money, and the loudest and most obnoxious voice of all repeatedly telling me I was far to stupid. People around me echoed these thoughts and I listened. Not any more.
I am going to college. Classes start next week and I am scared as all get out. The possibility of falling flat on my face is real, but I refuse to dwell on that. Instead I will set realistic goals and become the someone I was meant to be.
Oh one of my classes this semester is College Writing. Even though that is not the field I am working towards, I am very excited to be taking writing.
There’s no place to go but up from here.