What do you write when life has drained all creativity out of you?
The whole month of July came and went. It was spent running back and forth to the city. Sitting for hours on end in the freezing cold SICU. Dressed for winter while the temps outside topped off in the high 90’s.
I feel as if the cold has lodged in my soul and nothing is left to come out. Nothing creative, nothing positive, nothing pleasant, nothing warm.
Mom is home. She is frail, at best. Her diet consists of soft, ground, and low fiber foods. Her memory level is low, and her anxiety level is high along with her confusion and paranoia.
It drains me completely.
I find myself counting the hours down until she goes to bed for the night. Just so I can tune out of this world. Things will progress as they must with me dragging along the best I can. When the time comes, I hope I am able to peel off the layers from the soul sucking cold of the SICU and feel some creative warmth again.