As I sit here on a very snowy Wednesday morning I think of all the things I can write about, all the things I want to write about, and all the things I haven’t written about. They are all one in the same. Why no writing? Fear. Plain and simple fear.
Over the last couple of weeks there have been so many things going on. Everything from frustration at work to abusive relationships, that my fingers should be cramped from all the typing. What stops me is advice my mother gave me. Don’t ever put anything in writing. People can find it and read it. They might even use it against you.
Those might not be the exact words but it is the meaning. The reason I have such a hard time putting words to paper. Fear that someone will read them. What a crazy thought for someone who has always loved to write. I am simply afraid someone will think I am a bit crazy or weird because of something I wrote. Fear has been incapacitating, but not any longer.
To my list of goals for 2011 I would like to add, chip through the wall of fear that keeps me from writing. Stop finding excuses like lack of time to cover for that fear and just put the words down. Make friends with more writers, artistic types, natural people, and just let me be me. I want to start living being who I am and stop worrying about who people think I should be.